Friday’s crammed cable marathon is why some press wags refer to the TCA tour as the “Baatan death march with cocktails.” Critics had 45 minutes to run, eat and file the breaking news about Patrick Swayze before getting back down to new business. The afternoon sessions were even more jam-packed, with E!, HBO and the Discovery Networks on a schedule that extended well into the evening.

1:30-2:45 pm Comcast Networks (E! Entertainment/Style)
The Style Network:

Messiest House
Reality Series – Premieres 2009
Remember Niecy Nash from that short-lived Fox abomination Do Not Disturb? She’s back with her clean house crew in another one of these people are messy chumps series. I’m not sure if this is a step up or a step back for Nash, who wakes up the room with her 100-watt personality.

E! Entertainment Television:

Keeping Up with the Kardashians
Third Season Premieres March 2009
We’re told by hyperbolic network boss Ted Harbert that this series is a hit “from Denver to Dubai.” Maybe but seems to me it is a bit of a dud in Canada. Celebutant daughter Kim Kardashian says she’s “definitely grown up a lot” since she flamed out on Dancing With The Stars. Former Olympian Bruce Jenner, who has been step dad to these rich kids for 18 years, tells critics he’s just “happy that everybody can see what I’ve been going through all these years.” He makes the mistake of getting into a battle of wits with the Philly critic Jonathan Storm. Greybeard Stormy suggested he might not be in Kim’s demo. “Are you in my demo?”asks Jenner, barely recognizable from his Battle of the Network Stars days after decades of cosmetic surgery. “Hard to tell by looking at you,” sniffs Stormy.

Gotta go cover the Golden Globes so let’s make this a three part post.

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